What If We’re Misdiagnosing Women?
This article is for the managers. Especially the ones who genuinely care about their people.
Have you ever thought:
"Something feels off with [fill in the name]."
"She doesn't seem as engaged as she used to be."
"She's not operating at the same level."
"Maybe she's burned out."
"Maybe she's peaked."
Now ask yourself a different question: What if your observation was accurate, but your conclusion was wrong?
One of the most important insights I've learned on this journey is that perimenopause often begins in the brain long before women connect the dots themselves.
The symptoms can look remarkably similar to the things managers are trained to watch for:
Lower energy
Reduced confidence
Difficulty concentrating
Forgetfulness
Emotional reactions
Withdrawal
Loss of engagement
From a leadership perspective, those symptoms often trigger concern. From a biological perspective, they may signal something entirely different.
The challenge is that managers can't see hormones. They can only see behavior. And when behavior changes, we naturally create explanations:
She's losing interest.
She's overwhelmed.
She's no longer ambitious.
She's not ready for the next role.
But what if she's working twice as hard just to maintain the same level of performance? What if she's lying awake every night? What if she's struggling with anxiety she can't explain? What if she's terrified someone will notice? What if she hasn't lost her spark at all?
This isn't an argument for lowering standards. It's an argument for improving understanding.
The women most likely to experience perimenopause are often the same women organizations can least afford to lose. They are directors. Vice presidents. Founders. Subject matter experts. Mentors. The people carrying decades of institutional knowledge.
The question isn't whether women should be treated differently. The question is whether we are accurately interpreting what we're seeing. Because if we're not, we may be quietly pushing talented women out of the workforce during the exact years when they have the most to contribute.
And that's a leadership issue.
It’s why I created The Spark Framework. A practical guide for organizations and managers to have a compassionate conversation about midlife at work. It’s the ultimate “how-to” communications guide for what companies should be thinking about now and how to approach conversations that may once have been off-limits, difficult or uncomfortable. And similarly, a guide for women to understand how to start these conversations with managers without fear of being dismissed.
Every working woman will go through this midlife transition while simultaneously over-achieving, trying to deliver, and trying to prove herself. Let’s support her.
